Normal

Sunday evening.  Our home is usually abuzz (is that a word?) with our preparations for the week.  Not today.  It is eerily quiet, and there is almost a melancholy feel in the air.  Maybe it's just me.  Or maybe it's the fact that early tomorrow morning, Bayleigh is undergoing an MRI and we are scared.  It doesn't help that no one reassures us that this is a just-in-case kind of procedure that will show that all is well.  It doesn't help that everytime I talk with her neurologist, he reminds me that she is atypical for this disorder type and that there are many unknowns.  Nor does it help that she is maxed out on her medication, yet she is still having 20-25 seizures per day.  There isn't much else to say really.  I find it very difficult to lay my worry aside, even though I know my God is capable of healing her little body completely and making her new again.  In an instant, he could make her normal again.  Normal.  NOT atypical.

Then I am reminded that normal is relative and that the Lord did not create us all equal.  He did, however, make us each UNIQUE...with different gifts, different spirits.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future"

~Jeremiah 29:11~

Over the course of the last five weeks, I have meditated often on the verse we selected for Bayleigh's dedication...

For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.

~Ephesians 2:10~

None of this comes as a surprise to the Lord.  He created Bayleigh to be just who she is.  So...this could be Bayleigh's normal for a very long time...no matter how I might try to will it to be otherwise.  I have to remind myself everyday that He has it all under control.  Tomorrow will be the same.  I will wake up and pray the same prayer for her...for restoration.  And I will pray the same prayer for myself...that I will remind myself who Bayleigh is in HIM...and that is all that matters.