when I grow up...

Last month, I finished my fourth semester since I returned to school as an adult.  I can't believe it has been that long.  I can't believe that's how long I have left!  Some days, there seems to be no end in sight.  But I will continue to push through to the goal...the completion of nursing school.

I haven't always wanted to be a nurse.  I started out wanting to be an elementary school teacher.  I started college right out of high school feeling confident in my chosen course of study.  But gone were the days when good grades came easy to me.  Work, friends, boys, and everything else were priority over studying.  I got mediocre to bad grades in most of my classes.  Needing a fresh start, I transferred from the small private school where I began to a big university.  Instead of a fresh start, I was distracted by the city that surrounded me.  My grades did not improve, and I barely kept myself afloat during that time.  There was a lot going on in the background that contributed to my floundering, but you get the gist.  I was failing.  After my fourth year of college, I got married, returned to school for one more semester, and then moved away.  9 semesters of college and nothing to show for it.  See a pattern here?  I was running from my failures, but that's a whole different therapy session!  ;)

Much has happened since those first four years of college...the birth of my first three little people, divorce from their father, remarriage to an amazing man, the birth of my last three little people...throw in a couple of administrative jobs and dabbling in my photography hobby, and you have a very full 10 years before I decided to try to school adventure again.

I was quite hesitant at first.  After all, my record was full of scars that would be very difficult to remove and I was very quick to give up on something when a good excuse came along.  All summer, I prayed and stewed and prayed and stewed.  Two weeks before classes were to begin, I made the decision...well, me along with the gentle nudging of my sweet husband!  It was disturbing to hear that most of my previous credits would not transfer directly in and that I would begin my second round of college with nearly 100 hours of electives.  But, here I am four semesters later and a 3.5 GPA!  I have elected to take the summer off to spend with my family (at their request) and resume later with a light load this fall.  In the spring, I will be full swing into my nursing classes.  For me, that means no turning back.  I am anxious, nervous, excited, fearful even.  But I can and will do it.  The Lord has had His hand all over this.  When I have felt like giving up, He has been there to push me through.  He has given my husband, my family, and my friends the words to say to encourage me.

Thank you, Lord, for pushing me to be my best and for giving me a spirit of commitment.  May I no longer be an example of quitting, but of persevering.